


It's All Atsumu's Fault

by HeadEmptyJustAnime



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Akagi is chaotic convince me otherwise, Aran doesn't get payed enough, Attempt at Humor, Crack Treated Seriously, Gen, How Do I Tag, Inarizaki being idiots, No beta we die on the inside, OsaSuna if you squint, Truth or Dare, atsumu gets clowned, slight Atsukita
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-14
Updated: 2021-01-14
Packaged: 2021-03-12 04:41:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28754550
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HeadEmptyJustAnime/pseuds/HeadEmptyJustAnime
Summary: The classroom was empty, or at least it would have been if it weren’t for the seven idiots who decided playing truth or dare at 3 AM was a good idea. Well, only one of them was truly idiotic. The other six still weren’t quite sure how they got roped into this.Alternatively titled: If you're not scared of Kita Shinsuke, you probably should be.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 27





	It's All Atsumu's Fault

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! This is my first ever fan fiction, so thanks for clicking on it! I honestly don't know why I wrote this. Sorry if I messed up the Kansai accents. 
> 
> Anyways, I hope you enjoy Inarizaki being idiots.

The classroom was empty, or at least it would have been if it weren’t for the seven idiots who decided playing truth or dare at 3 AM was a good idea. Well, only one of them was truly idiotic. The other six still weren’t quite sure how they got roped into this.

“So. Um…” Riseki shuffled nervously. “Why exactly am I here?”

“Truth or dare is an essential part of any trainin’ camp!” declared Atsumu, looking far too proud of himself.

“I could be sleepin’ right now,” mourned Osamu. He plopped on the floor next to Suna, rubbing his eyes.

“I’m only here to get blackmail material,” said Suna, bored eyes never leaving his phone.

Aran sighed, a heavy weariness on his face that came from years of dealing with the Miya twins. “And I’m only here to make sure you shits don’t get yer selves into too much trouble.”

“I’m just here to witness the chaos,” said Akagi, eyes shining with mischief.

Aran sighs again. “Yer such a bad example, Michinari.”

“You and Shinsuke can be the good examples.” Akagi laughed.

“Speakin’ of Kita-san…” Ginjima trailed off apprehensively. “If he catches us, we’re dead meat.”

A shiver ran through the second years.

“Ya know, Shinsuke really ain’t that scary,” said Aran, amused at the reaction of his underclassmen. “What do ya mean?!” exclaimed Atsumu in a voice much too loud for the hour it was. “He’s terrifying’!”

“Be quiet, dumbass,” said Osamu through clenched teeth. “Yer gonna get us caught.”

“Who are you callin’ a dumbass! Yer literally in Class 1!”

“Doesn’t change the fact that ya should shut the fuck up.”

“Oi-“

“I don’t think Kita-san is that scary,” mused Riseki, cutting across the twin’s bickering. “Just intimadatin’.”

“Shinsuke’s only scary when he’s mad. And he only ever gets mad at you second years cuz’ ya do dumb things all the time.” Akagi snickered.

“We don’t do dumb things!” Atsumu whined. Aran leveled him with a stare. “Ok well maybe _sometimes_ -“

“So are we gonna play truth or dare or not?” interrupted Suna, looking up from his phone for the first time.

“Aww, is Suna excited ta play?” cooed Atsumu, shit eating grin plastered all over his face.

Suna stared at him, unblinking. “I’m just here to get blackmail.”

Ginjima shuddered. “Ya scare me sometimes, Suna.” He laughed nervously.

“Suna is right, though,” said Atsumu. “We should start.”

Everyone settled on the floor in a loose circle. The only light came from Suna’s phone and the flashlight that Atsumu held under his chin.

“Ya look stupid with the flashlight like that,” commented Osamu.

Atsumu scowled. “I never asked ya for yer opinion.”

Akagi clapped his hands together excitedly. “So! Who wants to go first?”

Silence.

“Uhh.. Gin! Truth or dare?” asked Atsumu.

“Why do I have ta go first?” complained Ginjima, pulling a face.

“Cuz I said so.”

“Fine, fine. Um, truth I guess.”

Atsumu rubbed his hands together, smirking. “Have ya ever kissed anyone before?”

Akagi rested his chin on his fist, leaning forward. “Ooh. Gettin’ juicy right from the start. I like it.”

Aran sighed for the millionth time. “This was such a bad idea.”

Ginjima groaned. “Ugh this is so embarrassin’.”

“Don’t worry it’s only going to get worse,” muttered Osamu.

“Well… yeah I have kissed someone before. It was in my first year of middle school. I was datin’ this girl. Ya know, that stupid middle school shit where yer datin’ but don’t really do anythin’. And she kissed me one day. It was pretty terrible, actually.” Ginjima groaned even louder burying his face in his hands.

“Wow, how romantic,” deadpanned Suna.

“Ya’ve been single ever since then, haven’t ya, Gin?” Atsumu snickered.

“Fuck off,” the response was mumbled from behind Ginjima’s hands.

“Pick someone to go next, Gin!” Akagi grinned, reveling in the chaos.

“Osamu, truth or dare?”

“Truth.”

“Pussy.” Atsumu laughed degradingly. Osamu only justified that with a glare.

“Hang on, lemme think of a question,” said Ginjima, scrunching his eyes in concentration. “I’m shit at this. Uhh.. what’s one of the worst things you’ve ever done?”

“That was a lame question,” commented Suna.

“Oi! I’m tryin’ my best here.”

Osamu pondered the question, head tilted towards the ceiling. “Hmm. Well, I’ve dropped Tsumu’s toothbrush in the toilet several times. Only one of those times was accidental.”

“YOU DID WHAT?!”

Ginjima and Akagi cackled. Riseki wasn’t sure if he should laugh or not. Suna was wearing his usual blank expression, but there was mirth glittering in his pale eyes.

Aran massaged his temples. “God help me.”

Atsumu was on his feet, glowering down at his brother.

“Let’s just get on with the game,” said Aran quickly, hoping to end a fight between the Miya’s before it could start.

Atsumu sat back down, arms folded across his chest, still glaring at Osamu.

“Akagi. Truth or dare?” asked Osamu, ignoring his twin.

“Dare!” exclaimed Akagi. “I’m no coward!”

Akagi was dared to do a headstand, which ended with him crumpling flat on his back. There was a loud crash as he slammed into the floor. Everyone immediately froze. When a few minutes had gone by and nothing had happened, everyone relaxed.

“Sorry,” said Akagi bashfully. “I almost got us caught.”

“It’s fine!” said Atsumu brightly. “That was a stupid dare anyways.”

“Shut yer trap,” Osamu growled.

“Suna! You’ve been so quiet this whole time! Truth or dare?” asked Akagi.

Suna narrowed his eyes, considering. “Dare,” he said finally.

An evil smile rose on the libero’s face. “ I dare ya to show us something from yer blackmail collection.”

“Okay.” Suna shrugged. He scrolled through his phone, eventually stopping on a video and holding it out for everyone to see.

The six watched Atsumu walk directly into a volleyball net, glance around furtively, and walk away, hoping no one had seen.

Osamu snickered. “How do ya even walk into a volleyball net?”

“And he wasn’t even looking at his phone or anything,” chimed in Suna, smirking slightly.

“Ya gotta be pretty stupid to manage that.” “A special type of stupid.”

Atsumu was flushed red in embarrassment. “Samu! Suna!” He wailed. “Stop bullyin’ me! Aran, tell them to stop.”

“Why would I tell them to stop when everythin’ they’re sayin’ is true?” asked Aran flatly.

“Nice one!” Akagi crowed over Atsumu’s cries about betrayal. He held his hand up for a high five and Aran reluctantly obliged.

“Atsumu. Truth or dare?” asked Suna.

Atsumu, who was still flustered from the video, didn’t pause before choosing dare. He would later come to regret that.

“I dare you to prank call Karasuno’s setter and flirt with him.”

Akagi clutched his side, shaking with laughter. “Suna, oh my god that’s amazin’.” he wheezed.

Osamu was smirking, ready to see his brother get clowned once again.

Everyone else was caught between surprise and eagerness to see the shit that was about to go down.

Atsumu was staring at Suna in dismay. “Do I really have ta do that?”

Osamu coughed, but it sounded suspiciously like “ _coward_.”

Never one to back down from a challenge issued by his brother, Atsumu whipped out his phone and found Kageyama’s contact. His finger hovered over the call button. “Cant believe I’m about ta do this,” he muttered, then pressed call.

Surprisingly, Kageyama picked up fairly quickly, it being 3 AM and all. Atsumu switched to speaker phone so everyone could hear.

“Uh, hi? Atsumu-san?” The voice on the other end sounded confused, which was a completely fair reaction.

“Hey baby,” said Atsumu, in what was probably supposed to be a flirtatious voice.

“Uhh… what?”

Everyone in the room was pressing their hands against their mouths to stop from cracking up.

“I want ta kiss ya, Tobio,” Atsumu breathed into the phone.

“S-sorry. I- um… what?”

“I’m trying ta seduce ya, Tobio. Is it workin’?”

There was shuffling on the other side, and then a new voice.

“Hello, my name is Daichi. I’m Karasuno’s captain. If you touch our setter, I will kick your ass.”

Atsumu couldn’t hang up fast enough.

There was a beat of silence, and then the room exploded into rambunctious laughter. Even Suna was chuckling.

“Oh my god yer so bad at flirtin’,” wheezed Osamu between fits of laughter.

Atsumu was beet red. “Sh-shut up,” he stammered.

“I recorded the whole thing,” announced Suna, holding up his phone.

“Fuck. This is gonna haunt me forever, isn’t it?” groaned Atsumu.

“Of course,” said Suna swiftly.

“We’ll never let ya forget about it,” promised Osamu.

Ginjima was wiping tears from his eyes. “I haven’t laughed that hard in so long.”

Once everyone had settled down, the game continued. “Riseki!” exclaimed Atsumu. “Truth or dare?”

Riseki swallowed nervously. “Uhh, dare,” he said uncertainly.

Atsumu’s grin became menacing. Riseki felt dread pooling in his stomach. “I dare ya to steal Kita-san’s volleyball shoes and hide them.” Riseki went pale.

Aran decided to take pity on the poor first year. “Ya don’t have to do it if ya don’t feel comfortable, Riseki.”

“Yeah,” Akagi piped up. “Since yer the only the only first year here ya can have three passes.”

“O-ok,” said Riseki, slightly overwhelmed. “Um, I’ll pass then.”

“That’s no fun,” complained Atsumu.

“I think that it’s fair for him to have three passes,” said Ginjima. Osamu nodded, mostly just to disagree with his twin.

“Fine,” grumbled Atsumu. “Ya can have passes or whatever. It’s a shame that such an excellent dare went to waste, though.”

“I just really don’t want to get on Kita-san’s bad side.” Riseki looked away, embarrassed.

“Smart,” muttered Suna.

“Well, we should just continue,” said Atsumu, still sort of put out.

“Uh, Aran, since yer the only one who hasn’t gone yet, I’ll ask you. Truth or dare?” said Riseki.

“Truth,” said Aran decisively. Atsumu, for once, didn’t say anything about truth being the cowardly option.

“Have ya ever had a crush on anyone on the team?”

Akagi tittered. “Great question, Riseki.”

“No,” said Aran, a little too quickly.

Atsumu smirked. “I smell bullshit.”

Aran flushed slightly. “I’m tellin’ the truth,” he said defensively.

“It was Kita-san, wasn’t it?” Suna spoke up. “You had, or have, a crush on him.”

Aran gaped at him. “How- how did you know that?”

“Let’s face it. I’m pretty sure almost the whole team has had a crush on him at some point or another.” He glanced around the room. “Am I right?”

No one said anything.

“I mean,” said Ginjima finally, “I’m straight, but if I were into dudes, I would definitely like him.”

Aran sighed, once again. “Yer right, Suna. I had a crush on Shinsuke.”

“I had a crush on Kita-san when I was a first year,” said Osamu, almost as an afterthought.

“Same,” said Akagi, laughing.

“I’m pretty sure that I’m straight,” said Riseki. He hesitated. “But Kita-san is attractive, I can’t deny that.”

“What about you, Atsumu?” asked Ginjima, tilting his head.

Atsumu stayed quiet.

Osamu smirked. “This idiot has been pining after Kita-san for the longest time.”

Atsumu turned red. “No- no I haven’t. He’s lyin’!”

“Save it, Atsumu.” Suna rolled his eyes. “Everyone knows about your crush. You’re not exactly subtle about it.”

“This was supposed to be about Aran!” said Atsumu, trying desperately to change the subject. “Why does everything keep coming back to me?”

“Because you’re easy to make fun of,” said Suna without pausing. Osamu laughed.

Atsumu flopped dramatically onto his back. “No one here appreciates me,” he huffed.

“What exactly is there to appreciate?” asked Osamu flatly.

“Well first of all, I’m very attractive-“

“Your hair is literally the color of piss,” Suna deadpanned.

“Second of all,” continued Atsumu, talking even louder, “I’m the number one high school setter.”

“Who cares?” said Suna and Osamu simultaneously.

“Why do ya guys always gang up on me?” whined Atsumu.

Aran, feeling the need to establish at least a little bit of order, said, “Alright, that’s enough. Osamu, truth or dare?”

“Truth,” said Osamu. “And shut the hell up,” he told his brother.

“I didn’t even say anythin’!”

“Ya were gonna call me a pussy for choosin’ truth. Again, I might add.”

“No! Well… maybe.”

Cue Aran sighing, _again_. “I can’t with you two. Osamu, what’s a secret yer keepin’ from yer parents?”

“… Umm, I don’t know. I can’t think of anythin’.” Osamu shrugged.

“Yer lyin’!” exclaimed Atsumu. “I can think of multiple things!”

“Like what?” challenged Osamu.

“Remember the incident with the vase?”

“Oh yeah.” Osamu snorted. “One time me and Tsumu were playin’ volleyball inside. We accidentally broke mom’s favorite vase and then glued it back together. It’s been three years and she still hasn’t noticed.”

“Why am I not even surprised?” asked Aran wearily.

“The only thing that surprises me is that those two were able to work together long enough to glue a whole vase back together,” said Suna.

“We didn’t really work together,” admitted Atsumu. “We were yellin’ at each other the whole time.”

Ginjima laughed. “That makes more sense.”

Osamu turned to his twin suddenly. “Truth or dare?” Anyone could see the scheming in his eyes.

Atsumu locked eyes with Osamu, and the two of them began an intense staring match. The tension in the room was tangible.

“Why does it feel like they’re communicating telepathically?” whispered Akagi, eyeing the pair.

Aran rolled his eyes. “Just leave them be. I’ve gotten used to their weird twin things over the years.”

Finally Atsumu blinked, and looked away. “Dare,” he said firmly.

“I dare ya to say I’m the better Miya,” Osamu said, a shit eating grin disrupting his features.

“There’s no way this will end well,” muttered Aran.

“What? No way!” yelled Atsumu. “I’m never doin’ that!”

“Well, what happens if Atsumu doesn’t do the dare?” asked Ginjima.

“There should be a penalty!” exclaimed Akagi.

“That’ll just make things even more chaotic,” Aran said, rubbing his eyes. He never should have agreed to this. Unfortunately, he felt responsible for making sure his teammates didn’t get into mischief. If he were a stronger person, he would’ve told Atsumu to go away, and he could be sleeping right now.

“Well, ya know I thrive on chaos,” said Akagi cheerfully.

Osamu was smirking at his brother. “So? Are ya gonna do it or not?”

“What’s the penalty if I don’t do the dare?” asked Atsumu desperately.

Suna narrowed his eyes. “How about you have to buy lunch for the whole team for a week?”

Osamu’s eyes glazed over at the mention of food. “I would die for some onigiri right now,” he said hungrily.

Atsumu made a face at Suna. “But I’m broke as fuck,” he whined.

Suna stared at him, unwavering. “Then do the dare.”

Atsumu folded his arms across his chest, turned his head away, and scowled. “No,” he said resolutely.

“Well, looks like Atsumu will be treating us to lunch next week,” said Suna, smirking.

“Wait, wait,” said Atsumu quickly. “Fine. I’ll do the dare. Ugh…” he scrunched up his face grotesquely. “Osamu…Is…The better…Miya,” he forced out.

“I never thought I’d live to see this day,” said Aran, slightly amazed.

“Me neither,” laughed Akagi.

Osamu smiled in satisfaction. Atsumu’s face twitched violently. “Let’s just get on with it,” he grumbled. “Akagi, truth or dare?”

“Ooh dare,” said Akagi.

“I dare _you_ ta steal Kita-san’s volleyball shoes,” said Atsumu triumphantly. There was no way he was letting a dare this good go to waste.

“Kinda lame to reuse the same dare,” commented Osamu. Suna nodded in agreement.

“Shut yer trap!” yelled Atsumu.

“Lower yer voice,” reminded Aran.

Ginjima laughed. “Ya sound like a teacher, Aran.”

Atsumu turned to Akagi hopefully. “Well? Are ya gonna do it?”

Akagi tilted his head upwards, considering. He finally shrugged and said cheerfully, “Sure! What do I have to lose?”

“Your sanity,” mumbled Suna under his breath.

“Yay!” exclaimed Atsumu. Aran shushed him again. “I can’t wait ta see Kita-san’s reaction!” he said, snickering.

“It should be interesting,” admitted Suna.

“Why are ya guys so obsessed with Shinsuke?” Aran questioned, one eyebrow raised.

Atsumu flushed red. “I’m not obsessed,” he claimed.

“Sure,” said Osamu sarcastically.

“Fuck you! I’m not!”

“I just think it’s fun to try and get a reaction out of him,” said Suna.

“And you want blackmail,” said Osamu.

“Well, yeah.”

“Where should I hide Shinsuke’s shoes?” asked Akagi, pondering.

“Somewhere funny.” Atsumu’s eyes lit up. “Ooh, I know! Try and get them stuck in the basketball hoops!”

“That’ll probably make a lot of noise,” Aran pointed out.

“Ehh, I’ll think of something,” said Akagi. He stood up and walked as quietly as he could to the door of the classroom. “Wish me luck,” he said before slipping out into the hall.

Aran sighs for the umpteenth time. “I wish I could say that I trust Michinari to not get caught but…”

“He makes almost as much trouble as the Miyas,” Suna finished.

Aran snorted. “Ya say that like ya aren’t in on most of their shit, Suna.”

“Ya know,” said Riseki. Everyone started, having almost forgotten that he was in the room. “Suna could technically be an honorary Miya.”

Ginjima’s eyes light up with glee. “That’s true!” he exclaimed.

Suna pulled a face that is in stark contrast to his normally blank expression. “No. Don’t ever say that again.”

“It makes sense,” said Aran slowly, “Yer all tall, you all have dark natural hair, and yer all assholes.”

Suna threw him an injured glance. “Even you?”

Atsumu spread his arms wide, grinning. “Welcome to the family, Suna!”

Suna grimaced. “No, not happening. Osamu, back me up.”

“I already have one annoying brother, I definitely don’t need another,” said Osamu, deadpan.

“Well, that settles that,” said Suna swiftly. “I am not, and will never be, an honorary Miya.”

Atsumu pouted. “Too bad.”

“Ya don’t care that Osamu called ya annoying, Suna?” asked Ginjima.

“No, I take it as a compliment.”

“This team is weird,” decided Aran.

“Yer only now figuring that out?” muttered Osamu.

“No, I’ve known it for a long time,” said Aran wearily.

All of a sudden, the overhead lights flashed on, throwing the dark classroom into full brightness. Everyone jumped out of their skin. At the door stood Akagi, one hand on the light switch, cackling. “Ya guys should see yer faces,” he wheezed.

Aran glared at him. “Not funny. Turn the lights back off.”

Akagi complied, still giggling, and returned back to his spot on the floor.

“Way to nearly give me a heart attack,” muttered Suna.

“That was a mean trick,” complained Atsumu. “But how did it go? Did ya hide his shoes?”

Akagi grinned devilishly. “I sure did.”

“Where?” asked Riseki.

“In Atsumu’s locker,” Akagi stated matter-of-factly.

“WHAT!?” screeched Atsumu. “Why would ya do that?! He’ll think I took them!”

Osamu and Ginjima laughed so hard that they fall onto their sides. Suna started discreetly taking photos of Atsumu’s agitated face.

“Well, it was your dare,” pointed out Aran.

“But that doesn’t mean he had to hide them in my locker!” Atsumu protested. “There are so many other places you could hide them!”

Akagi snickered. “I regret nothing.” Atsumu sulked, turning away. “Suna, truth or dare?” asked Akagi.

“Truth,” Suna selected.

There was an evil glint in the libero’s eyes. “Which Miya would ya rather kiss?”

“Well, Osamu, of course,” said Suna with zero hesitation. His expression didn’t change a bit.

“What?! Why?!” asked Atsumu, suffering from yet another hit to his ego. Osamu hoped that no one could see his flushed face in the darkness.

“Why would I ever want to kiss you, Atsumu?” Suna deadpanned.

“Well, I’ve kissed more people than shitty Samu!” Atsumu retorted.

Suna stared him down. “That doesn’t change anything.”

“What a stupid argument,” Aran commented.

Osamu finally found his voice. “I’m sure that most people would rather kiss me than you, Tsumu.”

“Not true!” Atsumu protested.

“True,” mumbled Suna through a smirk. “Hey Ginjima, truth or-“

“What are ya guys doing?” A voice from across the room interrupted.

Everyone turned sharply, hoping to god that it wasn’t who they thought it was. But their hopes were in vain, because Kita Shinsuke stood at the doorway, arms folded, gazing at his teammates disapprovingly.

“Well, shit,” Suna summed up exactly what everyone was thinking.

“We can explain!” said Atsumu in a panic, before blustering his way through the reason they were in this classroom at 3 AM. “You see, I wanted ta play truth or dare, ya know, an essential part of any trainin' camp!…”

———

The next morning, the seven troublemakers ran laps for two hours while the rest of the team did their normal drills. In the end, it was all Atsumu’s fault.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry if the end feels rushed, I'm not great with endings. 
> 
> Feel free to leave kudos or a comment if you enjoyed!


End file.
